I thought this exercise was suppose to make you feel good... I have been out walking for an hour and during this time was in tears. Got home and as ever checked to see if she had been on line and yes, she had...why do I do this, I have to stop, it crucifies me every time and end up in tears. She hadn't been online for a couple of days and I was just praying she had given up and not persuing this, then this morning, wham she was online last night chatting and talking to someone else, someone that will never love her as I do, bu maybe they are rich, she likes rich, to give her a house, stability and a lifestyle...money, money money again.
Showered the looked in the mirror and what did I see... some old fat teary man looking back at me. I know it;s early days in the diet, but I despise what I see looking back at. How did I get like this, how could I let myself go like this, rolls of fat. No wonder she didn't find me attractive any more, fat, needy and a loser....not very attaractiv......just feel sad, alone and very very fat!
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