What a bitch...

Woke up in the middle of the night and thought....

I have so been used. Ok I have my faults and depression in one of those but ...

She was so manipulative... "change or I leave you" ...plan, lose wieght, I want a house in london, me, me,me - that's not love, that's just controlling, manipulative and nasty.

Morals and integrity... what sort of woman, especially a "muslim" woman dumps somebody because they don't comply with her demands, then the next day sign back up for a dating site?

Lies, lies lies.... she told me that she was totally loyal to her ex husband... yet bitterly calls him a loser.. I suspect it was her that drove him into the arms of another woman...nothing ever good enough always wanting more...plan...succeed...plan. Perhaps all he wanted too was support and love. If i am with someone I give completely...  NOT WITH ME... I guess she never was with me...always on the look out for something someone better.

Despite me being a single father, it was always me that made more of an effort with journeys, always an excuse, work...daughters exams, moving home....new job...kids need me etc etc

The first time I ever stood up to her when I was knackered she sulked the entire weekend.

She accused me of having no money, it was her that could bever afford to go away - unless if was spending thousands on her birthday (which she never even considered sharing with me), or buying clothes or wasting it on vanity photography for her a son, or weekends with her cousin (again a cancelled weekend and then not invited or included in her family. I think she only ever had a family meal with us a couple of time, where I had been with her, cooked for her and her family countless times. We never, ever shared a "normal" weekend at home, doing just family things...always wanting to do do do... never enough, always,more. I so wanted to share domesticity with here, family life, the day to day. I wanted to get to know her better, perhaps in retrospect that wasn't a good idea. I wanted to bring her tea in the morning, prepare a light lunch for us both in the garden and have friends and family for dinner... such dinners we would have had. We never hosted one together...we would have been fabulous hosting dinner and long lingering lunches. Never even got a chance!!!

Such a huge massive overwhelming ego and so manipulative and bullying to both me and her family. Really does think she has life mapped and planned out...plan..plan...plan and no regard for the damage and pain she will cause. Just keeps flirting her way up a very moderate career path... ego, ego, ego.

And such a flirt, with any and every available male, who doted on her and she even ruined relationships without giving a shit of the consequences of her actions. How can someone who forces the Koran on their children justify themselves having a relationship with a married man - double standards and such hypocrisy.

She was the one who just went silent for three days wouldn't talk or return my text...so so selfish, with no explanation...just your not my husband, you don't need to know everything.

Gives the rhetoric that she been a single mum with no relationships... the more I found out, the more I realised there was a string of relationships...all sectret...and often immoral. This i also the great single mum that leaves her 13 year old and 15 year old alaone for a week whilst she swans off the Poland...two kids alone for the week- very caring and considerate!!!

And now involving her "muslim" children in getting her back dating...does she really not realise what mixed hypocrital messages this gives. She should be ashamed of herself.

Talk about my drinking... she was the one that got so drunk when first meeting my cousin and best friend that she threw up all of the wine bar...ALL OVER. If this had been the other way round I would have been dumped instantly.

Still on her profile ... possibly wants chilren...when we had a scare she just wanted an abortion (again how islamic!!!)...HYPOCRITE!!!

She deserves someone who treats her as she is treated...


Despite this I still loved her... just guess she didn't love me...just in to take, take, take and when she realised that her plan wasn't working - DUMPED!!! NO LOYALTY, NO RESPECT, NO EMPATHY, NO COMPASSION --

WHAT A BITCH !!!!!

So why do I still love her and would take her back in a heart beat... what is it about me that's such a sucker. I know logically it's probably for the best, but my heart, my broken weary heart, just want her to be here. If only she would walk through the door and say I'm here, here for life, unconditionally... I would do anything. Still deluded...I just wonder of she ever thinks of what could have been...we could have been amazing.